So I’ve been through a lot over the passed year and I just feel defeated. But the thing is that my feelings are the problem. I’ve been off my rocker for months now and has people pointed out my feelings aren’t what’s up at the moment. And I’m starting to hate the fact that I do feel a lot.
I just wish that everyone would just get off my back for a moment. And let me process how I want to process my feelings. I always let people figure out themselves and I just be there to listen when they need a friend.
But whenever I express my emotions it always received in a negative light. And when I’m around the one person who doesn’t mind my feelings, I can’t express them because what if it becomes too much.
Today I looked up chronic complainer because I feel like I complain too much. Well on the internet at least. But the thing is I don’t come to people with my complaints too often. I know people have problems of their own. So why should they be bothered by my problems?
The main reason why things happened to me is because I have no money. But when I get some money I don’t want anyone to say congratulations, nothing. I’m just saving up
so I can be maybe a hermit for the rest of my life or just to live with someone that doesn’t mind me being who I am.
A lot of thoughts are running through my mind and I honestly don’t know how to separate it all. I honestly been trying to keep myself from doing the unthinkable.
So that’s it for tonight my council members. See you in the next meeting. 🌙
